Want to be happy? Live life like a woman over 50

If the saying “life begins at 40” is true, I have an addendum to throw in: life really starts kicking into full-throttle at 50. You don’t believe me? Let’s discuss.

What age (hopefully) has gifted us women playing on the back nine (a little golf analogy) is nuggets of wisdom, little pearls of well-learned lessons, and a few battle scars that perhaps can be filed under the umbrella of “next time you’ll know better.” We have lived our lives, raised our children (maybe), and with a little luck, we have nothing but clear skies and a smooth runway ahead of us. And you know what? According to an academic study, we are the happiest demographic on the planet.

So…want to be happy? Live life like a woman over 50

• Stop wasting time: Tick! Tock! Time is ticking, so don’t waste a moment on people or things that don’t spark joy. Life is too short.
• Prioritize yourself: After years of caring for others, it’s time to put yourself first. Selfish? Maybe. Necessary? Absolutely.
• Embrace indifference: Who cares what others think? Not us! We have mastered the art of having zero f%ks left to give to those who don’t matter. If you don’t like us, oh well.
• The friendship culling: Toxic friends? Ain’t nobody got time for that! We’ve curated our social circles to make room for our ride-or-die squad. Not all friendships are meant to last a lifetime…or even past high school.
• Master the art of “no”: Decline that social gathering with a resounding “hell no.” Your time is precious, so spend it wisely.
• Stop playing fixer: You are not a one-stop shop for everyone else’s problems. Newsflash – you can’t fix what you didn’t break. Let them adult themselves.
• Find joy in solitude: Embrace alone time. It’s not just for introverts. So dance like no one is watching (because no one is).
• It’s not you. It’s them: Stop taking things personally.
• Friendship fiesta: Spend quality time with those fabulous soulmates who are there for you in the bad times, and commemorate big events by adding liquor to the ice during the good.
• Stop worrying: Did you know that about 95% of the stuff we worry about never happens? What will be, will be.
• Forgive yourself: The past is the past and can’t be undone. Learn from it, forgive yourself, and let it go.
• Take control of happiness: Your happiness is your responsibility—not your partner’s, kids’, friends’, or dog’s—okay, maybe your dog’s. Own it.
• Don’t sweat the small stuff: Let that shit go.
• Stay zen: React less, live and laugh more. Filter out boring conversations and those serious faces that suck your energy. Ask yourself, ‘Is this really worth your time, energy, or jail time?’

Happiness is not the absence of problems. It’s the ability to deal with, defuse, delegate, delete, block, unfriend and sometimes ignore. Generally speaking, women over fifty not only have learned these life-changing skills, but they regularly employ them in their day-to-day lives.

So sure, perhaps adulthood is not exactly how it looked in the brochure. I stare in the bathroom mirror and think to myself, ‘That can’t be right.’ Or a shop to Costco counts as going out. Or I find myself disproportionately happy when finding a good parking spot. But that study, I believe, is bang-on. Is my life perfect? No. Am I perfect? Not even close. But I am happier now than in any previous decade. I have mentally kicked off my shoes and unhooked my bra. And let me tell you, that alone is a reason to smile.