How to date in 2025

It’s a new year – so make space for a new kind of love.

With so much talk about New Year’s resolutions, it seems everyone is abuzz, trying to figure out how to change themselves so they can have the life and love they’ve always desired.

Yet, that is precisely the opposite of the journey of the self – and what love even means.

Of course, trying to be our best selves is a journey we should always be on, but we don’t need to become more in order to receive what we desire.

With the New Year comes the realization that it’s also time to start thinking about what you want, whether you are single, hoping to attract that great love into your life, or in an existing connection that you’d like to improve or grow.

One of the biggest differences in 2025 is the necessity for emotional intelligence.

Emotional intelligence is the ability to be able to distinguish what you are feeling and why; as well as how to hold space for your partner to express theirs. For many, childhood wasn’t a time to explore emotions but to simply do as you were told. This means that you grew up feeling emotionally disconnected from yourself. You may have had feelings but weren’t able to describe them or even pinpoint why you were feeling them.

This has led to the importance of focusing on your emotions on a daily basis, understanding what feelings you’re experiencing and why this is a prerequisite to a healthy great love. Otherwise, no matter what other changes you make; how often you go to the gym, or change your hair, you’re not actually going about relationships any differently.

It is a new year, but if that is true, then shouldn’t we start making space for a new kind of love?

There is a great deal of dissatisfaction in relationships at the moment. This is because as humans we are growing faster personally than we are romantically. We can’t evolve, or embark on a spiritual journey, and still think that the same dynamics of our grandparents generation are going to be able to satisfy our desire for love.

Love and relationships have historically evolved, but that also means – they still are.

It can be hard to realize that after marriage, or healing, you suddenly have no idea how to go about dating, or perhaps, even what love really is. But this is as much part of the spiritual journey as anything else is, because only in this space will your growth and healing be tested.

Let yourself embrace the new beginning of 2025 however it resonates for you, but also be willing to challenge your previous romantic beliefs. Let yourself grow beyond who you were so that you can actually experience the divine and hopeful love that you’ve longed for.

Because as with anything, the journey to love another will always begin with the one to love yourself.

The do’s and don’ts for relationships in 2025

1. Focus on yourself

Focusing on yourself begins with developing your emotional intelligence, but it also goes much further than that. You can’t sacrifice your dreams or truth and think it will end up as the love of your dreams.

When you are at your most fulfilled and joyful is when you reach the place of attracting the partner who truly will be in alignment with your soul. You don’t need to make dating a full-time job. Focus on yourself, your career, friends, family, and planning that incredible trip for the year ahead. The more you focus on yourself, the more ready you will be to truly be in relationship with another.

Life doesn’t begin because you say I do, but because you choose to say I am for yourself.

2. Don’t overwork for love

Along with the emotional intelligence and healing is the realization that you never needed to overwork to receive love. This belief is one that is prevalent in our society, especially with the feminine energy. Not only does it include abandoning your own needs, but it also means you are in a constant state of lack.

In many past relationships, you may be aware that you overworked or proved yourself all in an effort to receive the love you desire. But when you find yourself overworking or proving, you aren’t actually ever going to receive what you need. The point of this process is to direct you back to your own self and give yourself the love you’ve always needed. Only in this space will you be able to receive healthy love.

Reciprocity matters, and when you’re doing so much to get love, you have no space to receive. Trust the person that is meant to love you, will step forward, and be sure to create enough space for them to do that.

3. Honor your boundaries

Boundaries aren’t just necessary in karmic relationships – but in every connection in your life. While you may need to reflect heavily on having boundaries of no contact with toxic exes who still text you, it doesn’t mean that you can’t use them in other facets of your life.

Boundaries protect your sacredness and peace. Period.

Whether it’s with career pressures that have you answering emails before bed, family that will only ever see you as the person you used to be, or even those friends that seem to only take from you.

Your boundaries allow you to feel safe in any situation and essentially become your own protector which is key to attracting a healthy love into your life. Reflect on what boundaries you need to have to protect your sacredness and peace – and remember that you set the bar for everyone else who will treat you in your life. So, aim high, and don’t accept less.

4. See what is – instead of what you wish

The feminine are creators. We create life, homes, families, and all of the magical moments we experience. However, we can’t create a relationship with someone who doesn’t see us as relationship material – or who isn’t ready.

When your partner tells you they’re not ready for marriage, or if something was different then they would totally pursue you – take them on their word.

You can’t change their mind, and they eventually won’t change theirs.

But this idea of seeing what is also extends to how your partner is showing up for you. If they don’t hold space or make an effort – it is not an invitation for you to make them into the person you need, but for you to become that person for yourself.

Most of the issues in long-term relationships are due to the fact that both people think the other person will eventually change. And while growth is always a constant, seldom do both change in the ways the other wishes.

So, listen to the person in your life, see how they treat others – and realize you can’t, nor is it your job, to change them.

5. Be mindful of romantic dynamics

Regardless of the type of relationship you desire, or how you define yourself – romantic dynamics are always at play.

As a heterosexual woman, you can’t outwardly pursue and plan each date if you want a man to step in and have that masculine presence.

Yet even men can struggle with wanting a great relationship but let their anxiety get the best of them and end up pushing away a woman they genuinely care about.

Romantic dynamics are essential, and this comes down to masculine and feminine energy, regardless of gender, nonbinary, or orientation. If you want someone who is receptive, nurturing, and consistent – then you need to create the space for that. Likewise, if you are looking for strength, providing, and stability – then you need to respect the dynamics to achieve that.

You should let your intentions be known; however, you want to make sure that you’re not attracting the opposite of what you want because of how you’re going about dating.

Text first, but only sometimes, as you need to create space for reciprocal energy. As a woman, if you’re looking for a male partner, they must be the one to plan the first date. And in that same arrangement, you must respect the fact that men fall in love differently, so it’s crucial to wait 1-2 months before becoming intimate.

Mostly importantly, look into your attachment style because it can affect how you go about dating and by healing that, you can finally be in the secure place to attract the partner you genuinely need.

6. Step outside your comfort zone

Unfortunately, the great love of your life is not going to be found in the Amazon or UberEATS driver – so you must get out of your house to attract that great love.

This is partly why focusing on yourself is important, because by taking classes or joining activities that are of interest to you, you have a better chance of meeting someone who you are aligned with.

Dating apps can be great, but there is actually a big push in the year ahead to meet people in ‘the wild’ versus online. Opening a dating profile can be of benefit as it shifts your energy to being receptive for love, yet that doesn’t mean you should or need to solely rely on that to find a partner.

Get out into the world, try new things, travel, make eye contact with people in public and be willing to step outside your comfort zone for love.

This also applies to that type you may have in mind. While you may want someone who is tall, dark, and handsome – the person meant for you may differ. Reflect on what qualities, traits, and values you need in someone, without necessarily focusing on the physical or material characteristics.

While you can’t control who you’re attracted to, you don’t want to discount that great love simply because they don’t fit the mold – after all, neither do you.

7. Choose yourself

The number one thing that will be changing dating and relationships in 2025 is the ability to choose yourself. This encompasses every other aspect of how to go about dating in the new year – except it also involves your own childhood healing.

Too often, just like in the overworking for love, you are waiting to be chosen by another. This means that you are worth their effort, time, and energy. But in this, you are receiving external validation from a lover, instead of recognizing you already are chosen because you can do that for yourself.

Choosing yourself means you’re no longer putting your worth or value in the hands of another. You’re not dependent on another person to feel loved, beautiful or even sexy. But you’re also not waiting to live your best life because you’re already doing that for yourself.

Choose yourself so that you can finally choose someone who is right for you.

Kate Rose is a writer, spiritual astrologist, relationship and life intuitive counselor, and bespoke retreat curator.